Showing posts with label Feelings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Feelings. Show all posts

Monday, January 10, 2011

Now Open

Just want to cry it all out
I won’t talk about it
Just want to figure it all out
I won’t simply be here and sit

Why can’t answers come so easily?
When do we finally get to know?
Why must we catalyze this secrecy?
Where does everything fall into flow?

Spent my hours cruel and callous
No sensitivity, no mercy
Snarl and growl, so malicious
No community, no sympathy

Can someone break me out of this agony?
Will emotions wash me clean?
Can I toss the indifference and apathy?
Will trust rebuild the emptiness between?

Now the aura erupts its emanating glory
Color, warmth, and chills waft
Transparency anew tainted from discovery
Taking these for granted was quite daft

But no more putting on a show
Optimism is a blessing and a restriction
Stockpiling bliss before dealing a final blow
But now open and real feeling breach limitation

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Explosive Renewal

Situation expected from the very start
Knew it was coming after your heart
Certain to appear, but when?
Guard dropped momentarily, and then

Blunt and honest; why drop clues?
Upfront and direct; why not if it’s true?
Striking at the heart bandaged from rips before
With sharp stabs that dull and then hit the core

Water collects at the rims
But with a hard swallow, dims
Knowing that it hurts others to see you cry
That they hate the sight of your tears, so you try

Achieving what has not ever before
You cry no more; what is wrong?
Nothing evokes those watery streaks
No matter what emotion from inside sneaks

Feeling everything and nothing simultaneously
All and none at the same time explosively
Confusion sets in, but naught else would
Lingering on not as it should

Emotions built up a firewall
To pick and choose from the ball
Of eternity at once, cluttered
Pounded together, yet still fluttered

Negativity held back
Trying to fill that spot you now lack
Channeling that pent-up anger to production
Channeling that happy relief to laughter

Sadness escapes past the guards for a moment
Brings a wrenching pain’s descent
But no tears fall, ability temporarily lost
Starting that day, emotions combined and crossed

Feeling so fake and surreal
From such control; what was the earlier appeal?
Drawing on emotions; simple crops to pick
Shutting away, pushing aside any painful kicks

Mentioned at all, throbbing pain
Seen at all, continues to strain
But knowing other’s happiness, lightened
A smile forms, rejuvenated and enlightened

An entire lifetime crammed in,
Into the short test of time therein
Closer than most others would ever, could ever, be
Reborn and reincarnated into a new you for the world to see

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Blank Page


Cared too much,
Felt too much
Worries and anxiety won over
Caved in to the pressure
Crashed systems unreachable

Slate wiped clean,
Devoid of feeling
Apathy consumes the body
A plague sweeping through
Numbing the senses

Knowing naught and caring naught
A wall constructed to guard
Wanting not to suffer again,
To think of all the aching
Forcing others out

Nothing matters anymore
Life ceases to exist
Mentally shutting down
Until nothing reaches heart or mind
Unresponsive and unmoved

Passive and indifferent
Fading of all will
Motivation lacking
Zero actions taken
Not a word spoken

Friends and family bedridden
Filled with concern
Fretting to agonizing ends
Feeling all which was once felt
Faintly recalling what once was

Friday, March 26, 2010

Artificially Organic


Feeling nothing whatsoever,
Yet everything simultaneously
Pain and hurt through every endeavor
Hope for numbness, a constant plea

But proximity’s range,
Encloses ones held in endearment
Who deserve not this exchange
So it’s shoved into containment

A seemingly genuine bounce in step,
Brilliant smile that lights up the day,
Encouraging words full of pep,
But the eyes – endless, hopeless grey

Glancing in a hurry,
Depicts the illusion
Of not a single worry
A misfortunate delusion

Those in propinquity of heart’s reality
Know of the deceitful pretense
And together they ache in totality
Knowing naught to infiltrate the defense

So the artificially organic bliss ensues
Façade impenetrable
Countless numbers it shall confuse
Only self-healing held accountable