This is my Original Prose and Poetry (OPP) piece from the last school year (2010-11) for Speech and Debate... Now that I'm done competing with it, I've decided to post it up for you all to read. Of course it's not quite the same as me performing it, but it should be an interesting read anyway. Enjoy!
I. Teaser:
Schelly: HEELS!
Mattie: HEELS!
Karcyn: HEELS!
Damon: HEELS!
Fiona: HEELS!
II.
Intro:
Shoes, Shoes, Shoes
Aisles filled with way too many to use
Occupying department stores
Then there are those dedicated to even more!
Sneakers, Sandals, Slip ons
But we all know HEELS are the greatest turn-ons
Or possibly for some,
An omen of doom to come
Heels with their endless appeal
For your problems they are sure to heal
Or are those simply lies
Evil and death in disguise?
Soon we’ll all discover
A use for such and another
In “Your Soul’s Sole”
A Vanessa Wu Original
III.
Body:
Schelly: I was always bullied throughout my
childhood – teased for being the shortest of my class. I could easily blend in
with the younger kids – those who were 9, 8, even 7 years old – when I was in
junior high. As we got older it just got worse and worse. Shorty Schelly had
gained herself a reputation as the miny munchkin. I got called names, shoved
inside lockers, into trash cans, and tossed around. But nothing was ever as bad
as today. All of the above. PLUS now… I am cornered in this dark alley with a
ton of scary jock girls. A sweet looking girl steps to the front and, for a
second, I let myself hope that she’d try to help … but she turned to them and
said in a sickly sweet voice, “Leave the shrimp to me, I’ll take care of EVERYTHING.” She turned on me
then with an evil smile upon her angelic doll-like face and assaulted me with
her high heels. They dug into my flesh, tearing me apart, and all I could feel
was pain. And then… Nothing.
Mattie: When I was younger, I loved to play with
dolls and everyone still thinks I AM a doll… well… I’m SICK of it. I found a
way to vent this tension by having my dolls attack each other –dolls talking: “Hello
there, little girl. Well, don’t you
look like a doll?” “I’m not a doll!” “Aww, what a cute voice to go with your
cute face! Such a doll-like girl MUST be sweet.” “I am NOT! I’ll show you!
DIEDIEDIEDIEDIE!”-… but soon, it
wasn’t satisfying enough anymore. So when I saw all the jock girls pushing
around this midget of a girl, I came up with my master plan. Everyone thought I
was innocent anyway… so I would get away with anything! I took advantage of that little black alley and pulled
off my heel to use as a knife so I could finally fulfill my nightly dreams of slashing
across skin and gouging out eyes, but sirens rang and a cop pulled up, followed
by an ambulance to take her to the
hospital. The officer’s deep green eyes
darted between me and the girl unconscious on the floor. He hesitated a moment,
not believing such a sweet looking girl could have done something like this.
But with her being so puny and passed out and me grasping a bloody heel, my
self defense excuse didn’t pass so well… I should’ve thought this through some
more…
Karcyn: Heeeeey! Looking good! They see me rollin’ and they hatin’ and they’re trying to catch me
ridin’ dirty and they’re trying to catch me ridin’ dirty and they’re trying to
catch me ridin’ dirty and they’re trying to catch me ridin’ dirty (Chamillionaire)… Ah! That party was like so HOT! Mm..
and those guys were like smokin’! and they like totally couldn’t like keep
their eyes… and their hands… off me… SO totally lovin’ these new stilettos! Aww
shiz! The cops are like on my tail! Better pull over and put these sexy stilettos
to use! He walks up to me and tells me to step out of the car to walk in a
straight line. No way am I like gonna get like written up for a stupid DUI! I
totally didn’t walk straight but his deep
green eyes were like on my swaying hips and sexy legs. Thank god for my hot
bod! I bent over to pick up my purse and I was like totally off the hook!
Damon: God! My big sister is amazing. You would not
believe what that girl can do with a pair of heels. Never underestimate the
power of heels OR Karcyn! Her hot bod and her hot clothes combined can get any
guy to do anything. She’s the one who showed me the power of clothes. She’s the
reason I dress the way I do now. She was, is, my inspiration for my fashion
masterpieces. Speaking of which, I need some new heels! I pull Fiona, my
totally feminist BFF, off the couch and to the shoe store we go! Even though
she despises heels, we go way back, so she won’t mind coming with me!
Fiona: I was just flipping through channels spread
out on Damon’s couch like I do practically every day. And then, Damon decided
he just HAD to get some new heels. Why did Karcyn HAVE to show up with her
latest shameful scandal?! She is a disgrace for caving into conformity. I
remember when Damon and I used to play in the mud and wrestle. Then one day, he
insisted on dress up instead. Now he just asked for his shoe size for some
hideous excuse of shoes and the salesperson handed it to ME! Can you imagine?!
What is her problem? Do I seem like the type of person who would wear heels?!
These things are an oppression of women, so she can’t run from man! At least
Damon is breaking down stereotypes…
Schelly: I’m out of the hospital! Time to go buy
some heels to fix my whole height issue… oh look! Damon’s here! He’s so cute…
and he’s even accompanying his best friend shoe shopping! Oh right! My height
remedy!
Mattie: Ugh! Mental rehabilitation is such a waste
of my time… They should have realized it wouldn’t have any impact on me anyway…
Ah well, time for a new pair of weapons of mass destruction!
Karcyn: I like really can’t let my lil bro get like
all the fun… shopping and shoes WERE like MY expertise first, yaknow? Even
sexier me like totally coming up!
Damon: These are perfect! They’ll make my newest
outfit mind-blowing! I’ll look fantastic… maybe even as good as Karcyn!
Fiona: Ugh… those are death traps… Why must he
insist on heels? Out of the millions of shoe choices he could’ve gone with…
-sigh- I’ll never understand boys…
